Oh, Proverbs 31 Woman, you set an impossible (yet beautiful) standard.
I want to recognize that although sometimes we need to step back from the “law” of the Proverbs 31 Woman, we also need to work to emulate her. There is a reason the Lord chose to put her in the Bible and considering that women weren’t a huge subject (comparatively to men) it does Christian women well to think about all the Proverbs 31 Woman accomplished.
The truth is most women will struggle to answer positively for all these questions, so don’t freak out if you fall short. We just need to recognize areas that we are slacking off in and work harder in those areas.
My personal area of struggle is the getting up early one…geesh. And maybe the spending money wisely one…at least on occasion. I’m sure I can get a good “amen” from some of you other ladies out there!
15 Questions All Proverbs 31 Women Must Ask Themselves
1. Does your husband trust you?
Her husband has full confidence in her and lacks nothing of value. She brings him good, not harm, all the days of her life.
The Proverbs 31 Woman has the confidence of her husband. When he requests for her to do something, she does it…he doesn’t have to wonder if things are going to get done. If he tell her a secret, he’s sure that it will stay between them. She doesn’t poke fun of him at his expense. He can rest assure that when he’s not around, she’s only speaking good thing about him. She takes his thoughts and desires into consideration wherever she is and in whatever she does.
2. Are your spending your money wisely?
She is like the merchant ships, bringing her food from afar.
She considers a field and buys it; out of her earnings she plants a vineyard.
The Proverbs 31 Woman doesn’t mind going far for a good deal on food (or clothing), as long as it’s a worthy endeavor. She might clip coupons or buy things on Craigslist instead of paying full-price. She also THINKS before she spends money. She doesn’t spend frivolously. She’s an investor. And brings in income when she can.
3. Are you working hard or hardly working?
She selects wool and flax and works with eager hands.
She sets about her work vigorously; her arms are strong for her tasks.
She sees that her trading is profitable, and her lamp does not go out at night.
In her hand she holds the distaff and grasps the spindle with her fingers.
She makes linen garments and sells them, and supplies the merchants with sashes.
A true Proverbs 31 woman is a hard worker. She learns crafts that benefits her family and her bank account. She’s always learning how to perfect whatever work she’s doing. She’s efficient. She looks for ways to make extra money for her family.
4. Are you getting up before your family?
She gets up while it is still night; she provides food for her family and portions for her female servants.
There is something special about being awake before anyone in your household. I know for me, spending time with God before the children get up is a luxury and can often mean the difference between a good day and a bad one! Having food ready for everyone before they start their day is beneficial and makes the day go smoothly.
5. Are you serving others?
She opens her arms to the poor and extends her hands to the needy.
The heart of a Proverbs 31 Woman is serving not only her household, but others outside her own home. This could take the form of serving at church, making meals for new moms or volunteering at a local soup kitchen. She finds where the needs are and tries to meet them.
I’ve found that the best place to serve is where your find joy and passion.
6. Are you a worrier?
When it snows, she has no fear for her household; for all of them are clothed in scarlet.
Worry and anxiety have no place in a Proverbs 31 woman’s life. She trusts in her God-given ability to secure for her household the things they need before they need it. She anticipates their needs. She’s doesn’t worry about things to come because she’s already prepared for them.
7. Are you taking care of things at home?
She makes coverings for her bed; she is clothed in fine linen and purple.
A home in choas isn’t how the Proverbs 31 woman operates. She makes sure that her home is neat and tidy. She also makes sure that her own appearance is taken care of. Many times we often forget to take care of our outward appearance for the sake of cleaning (or visa versa)…but the Proverbs 31 woman finds the balance.
8. Does your husband get favor because of you?
Her husband is respected at the city gate, where he takes his seat among the elders of the land.
Whether it’s because of her ability to turn a profit on her business, her clean home or her upkept appearance, a Proverbs 31 woman impressed the men that surround her husband so much that he earns respect just by being married to her!
9. Are you confident and joyful?
She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.
There is nothing more attractive than a confident woman with a smile. If we consider all the things that the Proverbs 31 woman is accomplishing we can understand why she can laugh at the day to come. It’s interesting that confidence and joy follow a home, family and marriage that is in the right order.
10. Are your teachings in line with God’s Word?
She speaks with wisdom, and faithful instruction is on her tongue.
A Proverbs 31 Woman doesn’t speak foolishly. She makes sure that her words are wise. Wisdom comes from God alone and spending time in His word. Because of her faithfulness to spending time with God, she can instruct others.
11. Are you busy or bored?
She watches over the affairs of her household and does not eat the bread of idleness.
There are so many things in this life that can fall through the cracks, a Proverbs 31 Woman keeps a close eye on all those things so much so that she doesn’t have much time just to be lazy.
12. Do your children and husband speak well of you?
Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her.
“Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.”
The biggest test of whether a woman is a true Proverbs 31 Woman will be what do those closest to her think about her? Do they scorn her or do they praise her? It’s the truest test to see how things really look behind closed doors.
13. Do you put stock in your beauty or personality?
Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting;
Although the Proverbs 31 Woman cares about her appearance (see #7) she’s not overly concerned with it because she knows that all the beauty in the world will fade. She might notice wrinkles forming and put mosturizer on her face, but she doesn’t overly obsess over them. She might get her hair done, but she knows where her ultimate beauty lives.
14. Do you fear God?
But a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
The fear of the Lord is a best trait a Proverbs 31 Woman can have because the Bible says that the beginning of wisdom is found in the fear of the Lord. With wisdom everything else good will follow. Knowing God isn’t enough, a Proverbs 31 Woman follows Him, learns His ways, and trusts that He is the ultimate intelligence.
15. Do others recognize your works and faith?
Honor her for all that her hands have done, and let her works bring her praise at the city gate
When a woman does all these things, people will naturally grant a Proverbs 31 Woman accolades, awards and verbal praise so that all can see her glory. Her job, then, is to point the glory back to Jesus.